Now I love being pregnant. Really I do. And yet from the moment I found out I was expecting for a third time, I'd be lying if I said I hadn't been imagining when he would arrive. I'm an astrologer after all, and deal in birthcharts based on the exact time, place and date of birth.
And I was the same with number 2 too. (Baby 1 mildly escaped this birth date paranoia because I was just so overwhelmed by the thought of becoming a mum for the first time), But I think it's pretty true to say, that if your livelihood puts a precendent on when someone arrives (and departs), and if your career often looks at interpreting the cosmic coding of the planets, that you'll be hoping for the best birth chart for your baby that you can imagine.....and that's where the trouble inevitably starts!
The mistaken idea the you can 'play God'
It starts with the false notion that we can 1) Play God and determine the exact circumstances of our child's birth*, 2) That one chart is intrinsically better than another, 3) That your child won't be able to make 'the best of their unique coding' within their new life. (It probably highlights plenty other false notions too - these are just the main ones that my pre-natal sleeplessness will allow for now (anyone else get sleepless during pregnancy?))
So rather that show myself up as being quite an unblalanced person in secretly wanting to influence whether my child has this or that Moon position and fretting ahead of time in case, his Moon is conjunct Saturn or not........I thought I'd share what I have found out about parental birthchart relationships to the birthcharts of their children.
I should warn you in advance that this blog post is premised on understanding what a birth chart is, and how astrology works. If that's not you, don't worry, you could watch my free 5 part series 'Learn Astrology Easily'
"Waiting for a baby to arrive, is like a little sense of eternity. You know that you're about to have a connection with the unseen all, which will only present itself when it's good and ready. Its the same as Death. What else can you do but surrender to it?!" Carl Munson - father to be.
*Obviously some people can determine their baby's arrival with a planned ceasarian, but even then, there are always unknown factors involved and often you are limited to particular time slots - ie: can't elect for a C-section at 2.30am because it gives you the 'best chart'
1) Anything significant that occurs in your life, will show up in your birthchart
If becoming a parent is a significant event for you, your baby is pretty much guaranteed to show up in your life, when something significant astrologically is occurring. What I mean by this is that the planetary patterns and positions that match your baby's arrival, will match several of your own, and also probably your angles
Here are some of the most common links I have observed between the chart of parent and child:-
- One of the baby's outer planets connects up to either your Sun, Moon or Ascendant
- One of your outer planets connects up to either their Sun, Moon or Ascendant
- One of your planets connects up with the other's IC, descendant or MC
- One of your planets connects up with one of theirs
- You share angles - your ascendants, IC, Descendants and MC angles might share the same place
- You have a connection between one of your North Nodes to a planet
- Advanced link - not always easy to observe, but often children share the same quality of planetary patterns, indicating an almost karmic/psychological pre-disposition for trauma/learning. ie: A client who has an EXACT Chiron/Moon conjunction has a daughter with an EXACT Chiron/Moon opposition. They are dealing with the same family energetic problem, but are approaching it from different postions, but it is a huge driving force for both of them, that probably shows up in the charts of other family members.
Here are some of the most common planetary line ups I have noticed in the chart of an expectant parent:-
- One of the outer planets connects up to either your Sun, Moon or Ascendant
- One of the planets connects up to your Saturn, Moon, Ceres or Sun around the time of conception (or more likely at the time of expected birth)
- The Progressed Moon crosses an angle in your birthchart, or connects with one of your birth planets at the time of expected birth
2) Subsequent children register in your birthchart, but not always as clearly as your first
If you've already had a child, the move to adding in a second or third is less likely to create as much change as was created when you became a parent for the first time. Therefore, the astrology is more likely to show an 'enhancement' rather than a dramatic shift in your life.
My husband has 4 (soon to be 5) children. His first 3 children all came into being while his progressed Moon was moving over one of his angles. Each of them were spaced out in multiples of 7 years (not deliberately, just how it happened), and the progressed Moon tends to move over angles every 7 or so years.
His 4th child's birth occurred as his progressed Moon went over a natal planet. Her birth didn't show up as importantly as the first 3. That is because she was born so close in age to her big brother, and that Carl was already quite relaxed and experienced as a father, therefore, her birth (whilst wonderful and a gift) hasn't represented a big new phase in life, and therefore didn't show up as particularly shocking astrologically.
3) If your birthchart and the chart of the other parent have strong planetary links, the chances are your children will be more linked in to both of your charts than is usual.
When your charts are less linked in, it appears that babies pick up on micro patterns from each parent or one parent shows up clearly in the chart and the other is less obvious.
4) Your baby's birthchart will describe you and your partner as parents
This is possibly one of the strongest reason's for my feeling of impatience about giving birth to another little being. I want to see astrologically how my husband and I show up in their charts. I want to notice what they need from me and how I might satisfy that need. I want to know about how they'll percieve our relationship, ahead of time so I can be prepared.
I think this is probably enough to getting on with for now, but this is a VAST subject and naturally links in to so many other astrological/ethical issues. If you're more specifically interested in how parents show up in astrology, have a look at my podcast where you'll find some goodies.
The Feel Good Astrology Podcast on Spotify
So let's have a look at some real life examples. I'm putting my own family patterns forward for examination - it seems only fair!
Real life examples of parent/child astrology
My husband and I share some very strong links astrologically and have a few really sensitive spots within the 360 degree circle of the birthchart. Our main links that show up are:-
- He has his Moon at 3 degrees Scorpio conjunct my 1 degree Scorpio Uranus. This probably also accounts for our sudden and unsual attraction to each other, that shocked and delighted us!
- I also have Scorpio ascendant at 12 degrees, that is conjunct his Scorpio IC at 9 degrees. When something passes over this 3 degree space, it affects both of us at approximately the same time.
- Carl also has his Neptune at 17 degrees Scorpio in a weak conjunction to our ASC/IC connection
He has a Uranus/Pluto conjunction in Virgo opposite my Moon/Jupiter/Ceres/Juno conjunction in Pisces. His Saturn is also conjunct my Juno in Pisces
His Sun is at 14 degrees Cancer and my Saturn is at 16 degrees Cancer. Saturn connections can be difficult, but show up as responsibility and commitment.
His Mars is conjunct my Pluto. This is great sexually (haha), and also shows where a lot of our heat resides and how we deal with it!
Our Ascendants/Descendants and MCs/ICs are shared with a few degrees difference. As I said before, when something occurs to one of us, it affects the other soon after.
The elements between us
Both Carl and I have our Sun, Moon and Ascendants in Water and Fire signs. (two water and one fire for both of us)
If you were to assess all of the above, it's no surprise that our lives since we have been together have really taken us away from a standard western life of 9-5 / Monday - Friday / commute etc... simply because our mutual energy and values are so in sync that we've almost 'had to follow our hearts' (water/fire), and find something that works for both of us. We have emigrated, both work from home, and are involved in healing, coaching and communication. We homeschool our children, and live life in a really unstructured way, but one that suits us to learn and experience and explore together. Hardly surprising really!
So how does our first child together fit in to our birthcharts?
- He's a Scorpio.
- His Sun is conjunct my Ascendant, and therefore conjunct Carl's IC and Neptune.
- His Juno is conjunct my Uranus and Carl's Moon in Scorpio
- His Ascendant is EXACT my Moon in Pisces (and therefore is also connected to my Jupiter, Ceres, Juno and Carl's Saturn, Pluto and Uranus)
- His Mars is conjunct my MC and Carl's Ascendant in Leo
- His Neptune/Chiron conjunction is conjunct my IC and Carl's descendant
- His MC is conjunct my Sun in Sagittarius
- His Pluto conjunct my Venus in Capricorn
- Our Son is water/water/air. This energetically fits in and evolves our current family energetics from double water and fire to double water and air. Our collective sensitivity and receptivity is supposed to remain, but become more objective.
That's quite a lot of links between us all. Our Son is sensitive like both of us, yet has a more logical approach to working things out represented by his chatty, ideological Aquarian Moon.
All three of us have birthdates that add up to a number 8 too! Numerologists collectively sigh at this!
And what of our Second Child together and our birthcharts?
This is a little different, but nonetheless connected. Just in a less obvious way.
- Her Sun/pluto conjunction in Capricorn is conjunct my Venus and opposing my Saturn and Carl's Sun
- Her Moon/Ascendant conjunction in Libra is conjunct my Pluto and Carl's Mars
- Her Mars and Juno are conjunct my Uranus and therefore Carl's Moon
- Her Chiron in Pisces is EXACTLY conjunct my Juno and Carl's Saturn
- Her Saturn in Sagittarius is conjunct my Neptune and North Node and opposing Carl's North Node
- Her Cancer MC is conjunct Carl's Sun and EXACT my Saturn
- Her Neptune in Pisces is conjunct my Moon/Ceres conjunction
- Our daughter is double air, earth elementally.
So we have slightly fewer links between all three of our charts. There are more connections between mine and her charts, and maybe some of our connections are trickier to resolve than those with our Son. Our daughter seems much more practical than the 3 of us put together, which is a huge responsibility for a 2 year old! So having her in our life has definitely meant that Carl and I have grown up so much more to meet with her need for greater security. And I guess that is what happens as new people join a family. The collective changes, evolves and adapts its systems.
It has also struck me that karmically we are moving away from Carl's and my emotional intuitive preferences. From an element point of view the move has shifted like this:-
water/water/fire > water/water/air > air/air/earth
It feels like our family personality is becoming less psychological/emotional in our responses and more balanced/less personally attached to outcomes. This takes/moves our family collective from double water/air to double air/earth. Her arrival is shifting us out of emotion, and into a place of calm, thoughtfulness.
Extra and New patterns emerging
There are a couple of extra observations that have come up in our children worth noting. The first is that they both have air sign Moons in the twelth house, near the Ascendant.
As the Moon represents our emotional responses, it also is one way to describe their Mother (Me). At first I was surprised that I'd be reflected by both of them as an air sign as I have only one planet in Air and have never felt a strong connection with that element. But weirdly at my current stage in life, I have naturally learnt to appreciate my thinking and philosophical tendency. In meeting their father, we have both grown to become less attached to outcome, and spend A LOT of time discussing ethics and personal growth.
During this time, I have also fully embraced my life long studies in Astrology (an airy interest) and made the transition from working as a freelance business trainer/hypnotherapist/coach to working from home as a stay at home mum and astrologer.
Both children have been early talkers and can chat around pretty much any subject with relative ease. They both show a strong sense of fairness, humour and ability to understand, which is typical of Air sign Moons.
As both their Moons are in the 12th house, (which is traditionally ruled by Pisces), their Moons carry some of the significance that my own Moon in Pisces holds energetically. That they are intuitive, sensitive, pick up on energies, and have a connection or growing relationship to 'oneness'.
Am hoping that we can work together to have strategies for coping with depressive illness - as Moon in Pisces / 12th house emphasis can also indicate a vulnerability to adapting to the yangy/capitalistic expectations. but we are all on our own path and it is unfair of me to try and influence their outcome beyond what they naturally flow towards for themselves.
Another pattern revealing itself in their charts is that they both have planets around the 0-2 degrees Sagittarius. And our third child will be the same (that much I do know seeing as Jupiter has just moved into Saggie and moves pretty slowly). So all three children will reflect this new family pattern.
Birthing in a nutshell!
Which brings me back to why I began writing this piece in the first place......have just gone past my due date with our third child, and am finding it increasingly uncomfortable to sit, or do anything without the feeling of pressure under my ribs, and my weird craving for tonic water - what's that about?...and am in that strange place of gearing up for something that I can't predict when will exactly happen.
"Waiting for a baby to arrive, is like taking your driving test. You know you'll have to do an emergency stop at some point, but have no idea when. It's that weird insecurity of not knowing when you'll be shocked into action!" Louisa Tanner Munson - Mum to be.
A good experienced astrologer pal once told me 'You can never exactly predict when a baby will arrive or when someone will die. We just don't have the right to do that. But we can always see why they chose to arrive and depart, retrospectively through the birthchart.'
So on that bomb shell, I'll leave you to ponder the connections between you, your partners, children and your parents.........and what they might point to in the greater scheme of things. And wish you well until we next connect.
And who knows I might next be typing to you to let you know how lucky number 3 has mysteriously slotted into the astrological family dynamics? If my astrologer pal is correct, I just know it will all make perfect sense...
And if you'd like to explore your own family dynmics using astrology, to work out the whys and wherefores that you have come together, then why not consider investing in a bespoke personal consulation with me?
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